ajadedidealist
ajadedidealist

A Sweet NYC Love story

Speaking of the ubiquitous V-day, here's a lovely story about a couple that's been married for fifty years and their celebration in Brooklyn! http://www.ny1.com/7-brooklyn-news-content/top_stories/113639/golden-sweethearts-toast-valentine-s-day-in-brooklyn. Reminds me a bit of the opening of When Harry Met Sally. Do any of you have NYC-based friends and neighbors, or even relatives, with that kind of history?
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hhusted
hhusted 2yrs+
Ah, that is so romantic. Such a lovely story. Thanks for sharing it.
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DBlack
DBlack 2yrs+
My parents are a lot like those two.
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ajadedidealist
ajadedidealist 2yrs+
All the NYers I know are divorced and bitter, or single-by-choice well into their fifties and sixties. Can't say it makes me too upbeat about finding love in this city.
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DBlack
DBlack 2yrs+
Mine are New Yorkers and stayed together, alright. Maybe it's a generational thing. Only about half of the people in my circle of friends are coupled off with what you could say is a view toward permanence.
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hhusted
hhusted 2yrs+
There are so many singles in this city, I wonder why it is so hard to find love. I guess if the person is picky, it doesn't help. But when you read a love story such as the one in the link, ajadedidealist posted, it makes you realize there is a good chance of two people meeting and falling in love.
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DBlack
DBlack 2yrs+
@ajadeidealist Oh, and judging by your photo, I'd say you have some time yet. Most of my friends took their sweet time getting serious and only now, in their early and mid-thirties, are they looking to really settle down.
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uptowngirl
uptowngirl 2yrs+
@ajadedidealist that's so sweet..
Marriage in our times though is different,divorce is widespread in most societies.. I think people of our parents generation(mine have been married 43 years) have a lot more tolerance as a result of which they put up with a lot more for the sake of preserving the marriage.
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NeverSleeps
NeverSleeps 2yrs+
I think divorce is not always a bad thing - it's better than being stuck in a horrible loveless marriage, so in a way I'm glad that it is more socially acceptable these days. However, I don't think it should be given up lightly, and it has definitely skewed the family structure.
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Uraniumfish
Uraniumfish 2yrs+
Scroll down to New York City in this article about most stressful cities. Divorce rate, crime, and unemployment are some of the factors they measured. We're the fifth most stressful city in the US, alright, but not because of divorce! In fact, NYC divorce rates are some of the lowest. Go figure.

http://www.citymayors.com/features/us_stresscities.html
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NeverSleeps
NeverSleeps 2yrs+
@Uraniumfish I never would've guessed that the divorce rate here is one of the lowest.... I am still trying to rationalize it, but maybe some things just can't be rationalized.
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uptowngirl
uptowngirl 2yrs+
@Uraniumfish Interesting to say the least/ Who would have thought such a busy, bustling city the suicide would have relatively low suicide and divorce rates.
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DBlack
DBlack 2yrs+
A lot of my parents' friends are still together, whereas a lot fewer of my generation are together. I'm an example of not staying together, even with a kid, and I'm sure not proud of the fact! Blame it on our generation!
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Uraniumfish
Uraniumfish 2yrs+
I think in earlier generations people stayed together for other reasons besides love. Wanting love in marriage is actually only a modern, Western idea!
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JenMac
JenMac 2yrs+
The fact that NY is so low in divorce rates really suprises me too. I guess this place seems to have such a go go go / on to the better thing mentality that I can't wrap my head around it. I'm kind of proud of New York. . . unless people are doing it because finding a new apartment is such a pain :)
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NeverSleeps
NeverSleeps 2yrs+
I'm not sure I would blame it on a generation, but rather on a society that promotes a lack of intimacy - it's everywhere you turn - in movies, music, magazines. Sex is for fun and pleasure these days rather more than anything else, at least from the point of view of pop culture. I know I sound like Dr. Drew right now, but I can't help myself.
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ajadedidealist
ajadedidealist 2yrs+
Maybe NYers marry later/older because so many of them are career-focused - I hear later marriages are more likely to last than too-early ones.
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hhusted
hhusted 2yrs+
To all, one of the reasons the divorce rate is low in the city is because there are more single people than married. At least this is based on the latest census. As soon as I get the stats, I'll post it.
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uptowngirl
uptowngirl 2yrs+
@hhusted I would say that this fact is quite self evident.. I have often heard the phrase NYC is a 'singles' city..the perception being once people get married , they leave the city for the burbs where homes have more space and thus are more conducive to having and raising a family.
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JenMac
JenMac 2yrs+
Awww, that just ruined the Pleasantville picture I was making for the city with my mind's eye.
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hhusted
hhusted 2yrs+
@uptowngirl and JenMac; Yep. I was actually told by a counselor a couple of years ago that NYC is catered to singles mainly. There are a few people married in NYC, but not many. Most of them do go out and live on Long Island, or move to NJ, or other places.
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