msboston

This is the part of Phoenix where you go when you need a random car part or want to perhaps pick up a hooker. It's the ugliest, most forgettable part of Phoenix. South Mountain is nothing but industrial eye sores, tow lots and junk yards as far as the eye can see. If someone gets arrested by Phoenix P.D. and their car is impounded, they'll have to take a trip down to one of South Mountain's millions of car lots and reclaim it. Don't ever make the mistake of going to the Motor Vehicle Division located in this area; I worked here (for a repo company, go figure), and ended up having to visit the South Mountain M.V.D. for various reasons and the wait was unreal each time. I don't mean like an hour wait, because that's just the M.V.D.; I'm referring to HOURS AND HOURS. If you were there on a Saturday there's no way you'd stick around. I learned to be smart and only go on weekdays so I could at least get out of the office. When someone says "South Phoenix" it sounds bad for some reason. That's all myth. The South Mountain area isn't a bad area, it's just kind of sleazy. It has the strip clubs that aren't really registered as strip clubs because they're brothels, for example. It's not threatening to work here or live here, just boring and kind of icky.

I had the misfortune of living in this area for about four months. Let's just say I didn't stick around for my lease to end; the money I had to pay to get out of it was well worth it. I had already lost money anyway, since my car got broken into TWICE in two different spots while I lived in the New Village neighborhood/"Urban Village" of Phoenix. There isn't much to like here. If you happen to find a cool store or restaurant, chances are it will be closed down the following week or they will change their hours on you and be closed during weird times. This area of Phoenix is just WEIRD, I don't know what other word to say. I would say "scary" but it isn't really. This isn't gangland and it sure is safer than, say, Inglewood in Los Angeles. That being said, the worst thing about New Village that I definitely noticed (it's impossible not to) when I lived there was the enormous drug problem. The city of Phoenix should have named this neighborhood "Crystal Meth Land" instead of New Village. That's why there's so much property theft in the area and home break-ins. I lived there for four months and had my car broken into two times. The second time it happened, my car was parked right in front of my apartment. That should tell you something. There's tweakers EVERYWHERE in New Village. At first I was blown away by how many meth heads were stumbling around scratching their skin, but then it just gets really sad. And I got sick of replacing my car window. I recommend this area for no one at all. It's just a trash hole.

I'm a huge fan of the downtown area in Phoenix. This is where everything happens. The financial district is here, the most beautiful library in the southwest (Burtan Barr Central Library), the theatre, along with Chase Field, U.S. Airways arena, and the Light Rail. This area isn’t for everyone. Most Phoenix residents hate the driving situation, which can be very annoying because of endless one-way streets and very little parking. I don’t mind this at all though. Whenever I’ve driven around downtown it just feels like the east coast to me and that’s a very good thing. One of my favorite things about downtown is that there’s a very interesting mix of people. The white collar sector of business and finance professionals is a funny contrast to the second biggest demographic downtown: the artists and hippies. First Friday (Art Walk) is held downtown, because it’s where all the artist studios and community artist housing can be found. Housing downtown consists of middle to high end apartment buildings; houses and neighborhoods can be found on the outer edges that are historical areas or very low-income. I have never seen a new home, either on the outskirts of the downtown area or inside of it. Downtown Phoenix is mean to be called home by young people, either students at the new ASU campus located in this area or young professionals or artists.

Ahwatukee is a nice area, and possibly the best area of Phoenix to raise kids. This is partially because it’s isolated from all the other urban areas of Phoenix. The Interstate 10 freeway and the Gila River Indian Community reservation are on either side of Ahwatukee and sandwich the area so it’s kind of its own little island. Nature freaks and hikers love the Ahwatukee Foothills because of its seemingly endless supply of trails for hikers and bikers as well. The demographic in Ahwatukee is mostly comprised of families. The area is overwhelmingly white collar, and you can really feel it if you visit the area. This isn’t a bad thing, in fact I’m sure Ahwatukee has one of the lowest crime and drug stats in the state. One thing you don’t see in Ahwatukee that you see far too much of elsewhere in Phoenix is apartment complexes; this further illustrates the white collar concept as Ahwatukee is filled with houses, most of which are new homes. Ahwatukee feels new to me whenever I go to this part of town. The area is filled to the brim with just-developed communities, shopping centers, etc. There really isn't a bad part of Ahwatukee where you could end up in a lemon apartment or end up living next to a drug dealer. It’s close enough to be able to take the kids anywhere if you’re a young family, but not clustered in the city with the all problems that exist there.

Maryvale is a part of Phoenix that refers to Thomas or McDowell roads headed north to Bethany Home Road. It is located in the avenues, the west side, and most people consider it to be 20-something avenue all the way up to 80-something avenue.

All you have to do is go to Maryvale's P.D. website and you'll see they have their hands full. They have a list of enforcement goals and well...that's a pretty long list. There's always been a gang problem in Maryvale, and the cheap housing was popular with the drug pushers because it was inexpensive to set up drop houses and such.

It's hard to not be depressed if you are unfortunate enough to find yourself in Maryvale. The entire area just feels like decay. Maryvale mall is now a middle school, and everything feels uncared for and deserted. I certainly wouldn't want to shop if I lived in Maryvale either so I understand why that mall died. What's the point? Anything you buy will be stolen at some point anyway. And you could get shanked just walking around the food court.

No, it's not THAT bad. But it's bad. If you made cops tell the truth about where they'd least like to work, Maryvale is probably topping all their lists.

So, if you just want a cheap house and don't mind the sound of gunshots, go ahead the move to beautiful Maryvale.

This part of Phoenix is perfectly located. It's not too far east, so you aren't risking slipping a little bit north and ending up in Scottsdale with all the trust fund babies and gold diggers. It's definitely not too far south either, which is equally important. But I digress...The Camelback Corridor (40th st - 16th St on Camelback) is the best of the big pile of worst that is Phoenix. You have a lot of choices if you need a restaurant, there's grocery stores and any kind of store you could ever need up and down Camelback Rd. The schools in this area are wonderful if you have kids, and the quiet neighborhoods nestled off 32nd St just after Camelback are perfect for any family. You can be downtown in the blink of an eye (if you're smart), so sportsfans can take advantage of being right within reach of the Suns and D-Backs...if anyone still cares about the D-Backs...plus you get all the benefits of downtown like the gorgeous library if you happen to read or want to escape from everyone or enjoy Art Walk on First Friday. The best part? Since you don't live there, you don't have to deal with the traffic every morning and evening! Because you're less than a ten minute drive away from the cozy little Biltmore Area. Oh yes, and three more reasons to love this part of town? 1. Delux. If you can't appreciate the state's biggest draft beer selection and really tasty fries and burgers, then you just aren't right. 2. Biltmore Fashion Park. For those of us that love to shop, although putting an outdoor mall in Phoenix is so stupid it's unfathomable. Do they want us delirious so we'll buy anything? 3. Merc Bar. The only place worth hanging out and having a drink. The Mill Ave bars in Tempe are stuffed full of annoying ASU frat boys, and Scottsdale bars..ewwwwww. Need I say more? The Merc is classy, doesn't have blasting music so you can actually have a conversation without blowing out your voice if you choose, and the atmosphere is poshly decorated and relaxing. You gotta love a place that will tell a dude to hit the road if he shows up in flip flips and expects to get in. And as a bonus for baseball fans, this is the place to be to meet anyone on any team in town playing the D-Backs.