rockandrolltime

...until you saw the people on Madison Avenue. Actually, it's quite a humorous blend of couture, high/low contemporary, just plain low contemporary, and just plain clueless dressing. Skip the obvious places and go for Takashimaya (if you have the cash). Well, even if you don't have the cash, put on your prettiest clothes and go there and drool at the most artful selection of clothes in the city. If you're one of those tourists that love to go into Prada and LV and gawk at the big shiny expensive things, please don't expect special treatment. Those sales clerks are rude to everyone until they whip out their credit cards.

...so you can go home and eat some more. Seriously, if Chinatown had a "restaurant district," I would say Mott St. is it. Check out Harmony Palace (Mott and Canal) for a good place to bring out of town friends. Since its been renovated, it's seriously kind of swank/tacky. It'll impress people who are afraid of the grittiness (and Healthy Department doubts) of most Chinatown restaurants. Across the street, there's another place that's become more the local hangout since Harmony Palace upped their prices due to renovation. The restaurants down these two blocks are local favorites of mine.

There's something about Fifth Avenue. It's certainly stately, old, and historic, but it's also incontrovertibly part of the constant evolution that is New York. Start way uptown (I'm talking in the 100's) and hit the Museum of the City of New York and El Museo de Barrio. Beautiful places in authentic neighborhoods. The Conservatory is also right there (103rd), so you can have a romantic picnic that is unlikely to be interrupted since the area is rather quiet.

Then, of course, you have to go to the Met, that grand institution of art. I recommend you skip the European paintings (unless you're a tourist) and go to the Temple of Dendur (if you appreciate breathtaking sunlight) and the Asian art collection (first rate, and very quiet to boot).

If I were living in Manhattan (I live in distant Brooklyn), I would want to live as close as possible to 14th Street. You've got Union Square, which is arguably the New York park with the most New York character. Farmer's market on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays = fresh, local food. The great restaurants in New York send people to source food from here. You've got big retailers all around from F21 to American Eagle, and Sephora. The Barnes and Noble here is especially great, the building it's situated in is beautiful and historic. The park itself is beautiful in summer when the lawns are open. During other seasons, the regulars will still hang around on the steps. Lots of guitar playing lonely types with no money or other place to go. Then you have the young hip people checking each other out. Lovely, vibrant mix.

Madison Square Park, anyone? Great place to chill, especially if you live nearby. A bit smaller than the further downtown Union Square, but nice to admire the view of the Flatiron. Seriously, you just have to give props to the architectural significance. Also, not to bring up shopping in everything I write, but the City Opera Thriftshop is very near and a GREAT place to go for quality vintage clothes and furniture. You'll be the best decked out hipster in town.

Three places: H&M, Bloomingdales, and Urban Outfitters, within very close proximity to the train station. Sure, they're big retailers you could find elsewhere but I have to say that I think the stores on 59th Street are a bit bigger than the others, and therefore get more and better variety of merchandise. Wander off Lexington, and find lots of inconsequential "psychics." These are always fun to go to. Make up a story about your life and see what they say.

Perhaps the ONLY street in New York that I think is great for visitors and locals. Tourists love to gawk at the crappy merchandise on stands and go home with stories about going to the backs of stalls on Canal Street. But seriously, this street offers great, delicious, authentic Chinese food. I'm surprised the neighborhood hasn't been gentrified yet and promoted as some sort of "authentic" New York experience for high rises and condos and whatnot. I better stop writing before I jinx it.

NOTICE: locals do not shop at Herald Square! They just don't. The place is full of tourists and really sketchy characters that have no shame when it comes to hitting on you. The Macy's here is unorganized and pretty decrepit on the upper floors. There is a decent Borders towards 6th Ave., but that's about it. And the GAP here gets first pick of the Designer collections, which is the ONLY reason I venture here. I know they're trying to "upgrade" the Manhattan Mall but I am DEEPLY skeptical.

The apartments between Madison and 5th are seriously beautiful. Lots of stoops that teenage girls from Hunter love to smoke on. They're not that annoying as long as you tell them to pick up their butts. Hunter College High School is between Madison and Park, and seems to always be under construction, so their scaffolding is an eyesore. Otherwise, good for a quiet existence on the snooty Upper East Side. (Be prepared for 16 year olds with bags that cost more than you make in a week.)

The main Broadway is usually full of tourists. Not just in the theater district, but extending all the way to the Soho area. However, the shopping does get pretty sweet when you hit downtown. The secret? Wander a little off the main Broadway into the great boutiques on Greene, Prince, Howard, and Canal. Great places to go like Opening Ceremony, Intermix, the Apple Store, etc. Broadway has mainstream stuff like Uniqlo, H&M, and American Eagle. (HOWEVER Topshop is opening in October! Expect lighter wallets all over New York.)